Family Week!

Every week is busy here at Be Like Brit, and this past one was no different!  Len and Cherylann arrived last week on Monday to visit with the children and tend to some business, and our Be Like Brit family grew by three boys!

Len and Cherylann greet the children as they come home from school!

Brothers! (L-R) Kerby, Davidson, and Fredo

One of the week's biggest events (and one of my favorite days!) was last Sunday after church when Rosenie and I took 14 of Brit's children out with us and visited the communities they were living in prior to coming to Be Like Brit.  Part of our programming includes regular family involvement (keeping in mind that family may mean a variety of things in this context!) and while the policy itself is ever-evolving and being tweaked to accommodate for each individual child's need or desire, I believe it's very important to keep the children connected to their roots.

I sometimes refer to Be Like Brit as a "bubble of privilege", and the last thing I want is for our children to become so insulated inside that bubble that they lose their sense of identity and all familiarity with what the real world is like for most people in Haiti.  That's how we bring up a generation of future leaders who value things like reciprocity - by keeping them connected.

At any rate, the children were more than excited to go and put on some of their best clothes as we piled in the pickup truck and set out for the afternoon.  And yes, driving a pickup truck filled with children in Haiti does make me nervous!

Let's go, already! 

I really had no idea what to expect as we set off for the first stop.  I had spent a lot of time discussing the visits with the children involved, being sure they wanted to go, talking about how they felt about going, etc., etc., but still, those things you plan for the most often are the things that you have to have a "wait and see" attitude.  I wanted our children to be excited about seeing aunts, uncles, cousins, neighbors, old friends, and even a few moms - but I was nervous about the emotional toll it might take on them.  I mostly feared that some of our children would express a desire to stay - to not want to come back to Be Like Brit.  How would I handle that?

One of the homes from where some of our children came from

I was so relieved to be witness to the excitement and the anticipation each child felt for the others as we neared the next "house".  They couldn't wait to introduce their new brothers and sisters to their extended families or to the people with whom they were living; to show their new brothers and sisters their old home, to see old friends.  They were genuinely happy, excited, and spoke proudly of going to school and what life is like for them now at Be Like Brit.

Steeve was happy to see his Grandmother!

Something that I don't think I'll ever be able to fully "get" or understand is how familial relationships seem or appear to work in Haiti.  At face value, even when bringing children in to the Orphanage, there seems to be this stoic, emotionless, very matter-of-fact exchange of "child for birth certificate" sort of arrangement.  I always ask the adults bringing us children if they would like to walk around and see where their child will be living, meet their caregivers, etc., and almost always get an awkward no.  When I ask adults about visiting the child they will be bringing us, they almost always say something along the lines of, "yes, sure, when would you like me to visit."  There's not often tears, there's never a screaming child holding tight to the arm of the adult who has provided him or her with care for the last 'X' number of years.  At least not on the surface.  I remember crying so hard the first day of school every year until I was about 9.  I have yet to see that happen here - that separation doesn't seem to bring any sadness.

Walking to another house!

And that's how these visits seemed, at least for the most part. Children and adults were not overly emotional about seeing each other. They didn't run up to one another and embrace.  There were no tight, long hugs and tears of joy like we see in the States every day at something as simple as an arrival gate at the airport.  And I can't quite yet figure that out.  It wears on my mind constantly.  Is it that simple?  Is the presence of a child in your home so much of a burden because it's another mouth to feed that the absence of that child provides so much relief that the dominant emotion is not sadness?  Or is it a facade?

Socrate, waving?

I can't help but believe there's more going on beneath the surface, though I realize that's my own Western framed mind telling me this.  The whole idea of trauma is something scholars contest as a social construct of Western thought and not so much a reality for those who are supposedly suffering from it.  I don't know who is right and who is wrong, and quite frankly, I don't care.  I'll continue to be mindful of all of this while keeping the best interest of our children as the number one priority.  Smiles don't usually lie.  Our children seemed overwhelmingly happy to reunite briefly with friends and family, share a quick hug, and head back home to Be Like Brit.  As I spoke with each child afterwards about how they felt about their day, it was clear that all was well with their world.  At least for the moment.

Thanks for reading - and enjoy a few more photos from that day!

Jonathan

Old friends in the neighborhood!

Love na's neighbor is happy to see her!

Waving to Be Like Brit from another hill!

Ephesiens recognizes his old neighbor!

Many of these homes have yet to be rebuilt, 3 years later.

Back to Work!

Mariette poses proudly with the Easter cake she made for the children here at Be Like Brit!

Easter Sunday started like most mornings here at Be Like Brit do.  As the roosters started to crow and the chirping of birds began to fill the air, the sounds of the children rising from their slumbers mixed in.  From my room in Be Like Brit, I listened carefully as the children exchanged words filled with excitement:  "It's Easter Sunday!", or "my new dress is so beautiful!" - Indeed, there is an anticipation and an excitement in the voices of these children that is so refreshing and so rejuvenating.  They wear this anticipation and excitement openly on their faces each and every day.

Ready for Church!

I just returned to Haiti and to BLB after my first week off after 3 months here as Program Director.  I can't really believe it.  Here we are, swiftly moving into April, and the changes in my own life are far too many to count.  My own reality between September 19, 2012 when I applied for this position up to today is one that I still can't quite grasp entirely.  Five months ago I was working in the Sociology department of a state university, teaching undergraduate classes to some very well-off (mostly) American teenagers, and today by 8a.m. I've spent two hours helping orphaned children in the poorest country in the Western Hemisphere get ready for church in their donated clothes with smiles more genuine than any I have seen before.  It's quite a shift from life in the States.

We take so many things for granted.  I think that may be what struck me the most during my visit home last week.  Surrounded by family, friends, food, drink, all of those comforts of home we in the developed world "need" in order to survive.  A hotel bed, king sized of course; wifi a necessity; a rental car (because who wants to walk in the cold!) - all of these things seem so wasteful when you return back to a place like Haiti.  While I don't fault myself or any of us who know this as our own realities, it really is so trivial and so selfish to think we need any of those things.  That's something that Haiti has taught me, we really don't need much.  We just need to know different.

I definitely feel a bit rejuvenated after my first week off.  Part of my contract mandates that every three months I take a week to avoid burnout and fatigue.  This is a good thing, really, because Haiti demands the most from a person both mentally and physically - especially in a position like mine.  Living where you work brings a whole new meaning to being dedicated to your job, and the children at Be Like Brit mean very much to me like I imagine my own children would.  Watching things happen here at Be Like Brit on Facebook while I was away was so strange for me - and being removed from it only underscored how much these kids mean to me.

Rolson, Alexander, Kervins, Medlens, and Whenly (L-R)

I was so blessed my last two weeks in Haiti before my vacation to have Debra Pallatto-Fontaine on hand, as well as a visit from my cousin, Giovanina.  Debbie is a member of our Program Committee, and she wears many different hats!  Debbie is a Minister and an educator.  Her expertise and guidance over her two week stay was invaluable to our staff and children here at Be Like Brit.  Through caregiver training, modeling of behaviors, helping to implement schedules and routines, and her overall guidance have made life a bit less chaotic and much more ordered!  Our caregivers and our staff alike miss Debbie already, and we can't wait for her return again this spring to lend another hand in her gentle, patient, and generous way.

Debbie with Saradina and Kervins

My cousin Giovanina Bucci from Plattsburgh, NY decided to spend her spring break from her master's program in School Psychology here at Be Like Brit.  Part of me is convinced it's because she missed me so very much (Ha!) but I also know how excited she was to get the chance to work with the children here!  Giovanina and I are cousins, but we are and have been inseparable for as long as I can remember.  Something like kindred spirits comes to mind - At any rate, Giovanina wasted no time in jumping right in with our children, bringing along with her hundreds of dollars worth of art supplies, paint, brushes, paper, etc., so that she could share her talents and skills with Brit's children.  For those of you who missed it, she and one of our own caregivers, Willman LaGuerre, were able to paint an incredible mural in our courtyard - in just two days!  This mural has brightened up an area in the orphanage where the children spend much of their time playing, and together they produced a magnificent and culturally relevant piece of art which will remain on these walls for years to come! Bon Travay!

Willmann and Giovanina work hard on their mural which now brings new life to the courtyard at Be Like Brit!

During my week off, of course I attended to some business.  I am fortunate to Skype with members of the Program Committee every week back in the States to seek their advice and guidance on a whole range of issues I run in to on a regular basis.  From sponsorship policies, to visitors, rules, discipline, staffing, issues with children, etc., I have unwavering support from our Program Committee which includes a nurse, child psychologists, a priest, a minister, college professors, and more!  After a few days back in my hometown, where I was lucky enough to visit the 4th grade classroom of a good friend to talk about Be Like Brit and after visiting and catching up with my amazing and supportive family and friends, I set off for Boston to meet with a few members of the Program Committee.

While they are all important and valuable assets to me, I speak most regularly with Christine Steinwand, Len's older sister and the Chair of the Program Committee.  Chris and I Skype two times a week - sometimes for just a few minutes, sometimes for more than an hour.  Chris is a great source of support and guidance for me - and so meeting up with her while I was up north was wonderful!  Along with Susan Johnson and Suzanne Brady, we had a great dinner and evening together.  We even ran into Bernie Gengel while we were out grabbing dessert from Modern Bakery in Boston's North End.  I think it's safe to say we were all pretty content that night!

Susan Johnson and I in Boston

Suzanne Brady and Christine Steinwand, Program Committee members (and dinner dates extraordinaire!)

Blurry, but group!

While in Boston, I was even able to meet up with Tim and Mike, Team Leaders from the St. John's Group of Britsionarys we had here back in February!  We went out for dinner and had a great evening catching up! It was so nice to see that the relationships we formed while they were here as Britsionarys carried over into life after the fact.  The next night, two of the students, Tim and Quinn drove out to Boston from Shrewsbury to say hello and catch up, too!  These trips are about more than just coming to Haiti and doing some work - they are about forming lasting friendships and connections and common bonds - and seeing these guys put forth the effort to meet up was so awesome!

So, after some brainstorming and some rest (okay - a LOT of rest - gotta love those king-sized beds, the ones with the pillow tops - worth every penny!) it's time to get back to work!  As most of you know, we have 20 children.  Our goal is to bring another 12 children in by the end of May.  This, of course, requires us to bring in and train an entire new group of caregivers.  Rosenie and I will begin the process of identifying children and families in need, venturing our into the community to visit and interview them, and making those tough decisions all over again.  This time, however, I will have the benefit of some practice and some experience - and definitely the advantage of speaking enough Creole to know when I am being talked about!  This round will be different.  As the number of children grows here at Be Like Brit, my role shifts.  As much as I love being hands on with the children and being a part of their every day lives, I know realistically that working in that capacity is not sustainable nor is it in the best interest of the children who will call Be Like Brit home.

As I shift a bit and delegate more responsibility and autonomy to our caregivers, I do so with some anxiety.  I know with the help of my co-director Gama (Mr. Incredible, indeed!) and through supports from the Program Committee that in just a few months I will likely be reminiscing and exclaiming my disbelief that we now have 32 children - how I can't believe it was only January 21st when we brought our first child home to Be Like Brit - how I can't believe what little hair I have left hasn't fallen out!  I know the support and prayers from all of you who have been so good to Be Like Brit will help along the way, too!

We have lots of exciting new things in the works at Be Like Brit! I'm in the process of working out relationships with several U.S. universities who are considering Be Like Brit as a placement for graduate level social work and public health students.  We have other long-term volunteer (Britsionary) applications in the works, projects being considered, and networking and collaborations in progress.

Stay tuned for some great new happenings here in Haiti - and remember that it's only because of the support and generosity of our friends and the hard work of those committed to our cause that these wonderful things are possible.

Happy Easter! Please enjoy some photos from our Easter Egg Hunt, and stay tuned for more exciting updates!

Thanks for reading,
Jonathan

How many eggs did we hide in the toy box?

Nashca is looking!

Sherly found her two!

Loobens!

Saradina ignores an attempted high five from Giovanina! Ha!

Saradina found her two eggs!

Ephesiens is all smiles!

Gotta love that Love na! 

Shnaider is proud!

Mirna!

Whenly!

Socrate!

Daphney!

Madame Sintana wanted in on the hunt, too. Tisk, tisk!

Caregiver Carline snuck in on the hunt after Sintana! 

The Fruits of Your Labor

"For thou shalt eat the labour of thine hands: happy shalt thou be, and it shall be well with thee."

Len meets the children at Be Like Brit as he arrives in Grand Goâve on Wednesday, February 27, 2013

Be it serendipity or Britney herself at work, there's no question that some amazing things have happened here in Haiti at Be Like Brit.  Most recently, when Len's trip into Haiti scheduled for last week got pushed back a few days, we were all a bit disappointed that the larger projects we had planned would have to be rescheduled.  As Len arrived three days later than planned, he decided to inspect the road that the St. John's Britsionary group and our own crews had worked so hard on.  While walking up the road, Len came upon this wonderful sight:  The Be Like Brit children!  This was the first time Len met 11 of these children, and I can't help but think that the reward for his delays was stumbling upon this beautiful sight.  Indeed, the fruits of his labor were realized as he crossed paths with a group of children making their way home - to his very own house.

In some ways, the fact that plans had to change and projects rescheduled allowed for some very organic and genuine bonding here at Be Like Brit.  What might have been hectic days outside around heavy, loud equipment was instead meals around the table, surrounded by the very purpose for which this project was even conceived of.  Our children were able to meet the man behind this whole extraordinary and amazing journey.  They were welcomed home by the man himself.  It was a very awesome thing to witness.

The rule breaker!

As the Program Director, it's easy to get caught up in the management aspects of this job.  I'm constantly thinking about things like rules, structure, training, schedules, menus, staff, etc., that sometimes it takes the arrival of someone like Len to give a subtle reminder that Be Like Brit is a home first.  While all of those other things are requisite in managing a building like this effectively, they can also be impediments to creating a home like Len and Cherylann created for their own children; the type of home they explicitly want for the children here at Be Like Brit.  This week, I am grateful for that reminder from Len.  Be Like Brit is a home, not an institution.  It's okay that walls might get drawn on, that toys may get broken, that children might just fall down and scrape a knee.  

My only sadness this past week was the absence of Cherylann.  I know that the mother in Cherylann is so anxious to get down here and meet these children.  As the saying goes, behind every great man is a great woman, and this could not be more true of Len and Cherylann Gengel.  Cherylann tirelessly works the often less than glamorous, behind the scenes sort of tasks that keep things at Be Like Brit up and running.  

This past week, members of our medical group and Cherylann attended Middlesex Community College's Haiti panel discussion on "Disaster Relief in Haiti and Beyond."  We were proud as an organization to have our friends share the stage with a great humanitarian and friend to Haiti, Academy Award Winner Sean Penn.  So, while we missed Cherylann here this past week, we know that the work she was off doing is integral to our mission and the continued success of the organization.

Cherylann and Sean Penn!

 This week was what I think will be the closest thing we will have to a "normal" week here at Be Like Brit.  No outside groups of visitors; no crazy events or special outings.  It was a week of work, school, and play.  As we move forward, my plan is to have 20 children or so in Brit's Orphanage by the end of the month, and give them a few weeks to assimilate and adjust.  We'll be hiring more staff as we start filling rooms on the second floor.  We'll be interviewing more children and families and making more difficult decisions.  And none of us can wait!

For those of you who have visited us at Be Like Brit in Haiti, you know how much we adults love the roof.  The roof is only a staircase away from the busy chaos of a children's orphanage, but it is worlds away in terms of one's ability to reflect and process a day's events.  I try to go up there every night, if only for a few minutes, to remind myself of what it is that I am doing here, to sort of clear my mind of all the stress and pressures of the day to day, and to put things into perspective.

As I sat on the roof on Friday night this week with Len, Gilbert and Franky, listening to the sound of the children rehearsing songs and prayers for school and church, I couldn't help but think about how awesome this place is.  Having come to the Be Like Brit family late, and not knowing what it was like to go through the construction phase of this project, I feel like I'll never fully understand all that comes with having seen this project through all of its stages.  I can say, though, that sitting on the roof of the building and hearing the sounds of the children filling up its rooms is a sound I won't ever forget, and I feeling I can't ever really describe.

Each Sunday, we get up and get our children ready for Church at Mission of Hope, where our children also go to school.  It started out easy:  Getting Kervins up and ready for services was no challenge.  As our numbers grew, the amount of people required to get everyone ready increased.  I'm very proud of our staff, who live right alongside our children and treat them as if they were their very own.  Today, I was even more proud of Willman and Baptiste, who have really stepped up and taken on great leadership roles with the children here at Be Like Brit.  I'm happy to have these new friends in my life and blessed to be a part of this whole experience.  Thanks for following along on our journey, and trust me when I say we've only just begun.

Ready for church this morning! 

Please enjoy a few more pictures from the week, and as always, thanks for reading.

Jonathan

Kervins

Medlens

Scary Program Director

Steeve and Daphney

Shnaider, Rolson, and Whenly

Steeve and Socrate

Whenly and Rolson

Taking a hike!

Daphney, Kervins, and Whenly

Love na and Esther